


Shattered

by Autisticmockingjay (autisticmockingjay)



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: AU, Angst, Clove Sevina - Freeform, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, highjacked clove, mockingjay au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-04
Updated: 2019-01-04
Packaged: 2019-10-04 00:50:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17294528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/autisticmockingjay/pseuds/Autisticmockingjay
Summary: Katniss and Clove fell in love during their Hunger Games and won together sparking a revolution. Clove was captured during the events of Catching Fire and when she is reunited with Katniss she has been highjacked. Katniss refuses to give up on her no matter how much Clove tries to hurt her and throws insults her way.





	Shattered

 

**Clove POV:**

There’s a warm weight on my chest, I frown, my mind stirring, memories just below the surface of a hazy pool. I shift trying to move but find my arms don’t move far before something stops them. A soft scent reaches my nostrils, a familiar scent, my stomach twists, not in an unpleasant way.

The scent, the warmth, the weight on my chest, it makes me feel something. Remember something. I dive deeper into the pool of memories behind my eyes searching for the feeling. Safety, contentment, fill my chest. I remember.

Katniss rests her head on my chest we’re lying in bed, the room is familiar, forest greens decorate the walls but most of the room is fuzzy. She is clear as day, her head lying over my chest, her body curled up to my side. My arms are draped around her lazily, I feel… good. I wait for the terror to fill me, for the screams to rip their way through my throat for her to hurt me and yet, I don’t think she will. I trust her.

My arms encircle her she shifts laying a hand over my stomach. She says nothing seeming content to just be still and quiet for the moment. I run my finger over her braid gently working to remove the band holding it together.

Carefully I untangle her hair running my fingers through it, when I bury my fingers deep into her hair running them over her scalp she opens her mouth letting out a contented mewl, shifting her weight to be somehow even closer to me. My heart aches, warmth sits in the pit of my stomach I lean my head forwards kissing the top of her head, inhaling that sweet, soft scent.

She looks up at me, I stare at her face, half expecting it to turn into a mutt yapping at my neck trying to kill me, expecting the fear to make an appearance now but instead she just smiles at me her eyes warm and filled with… Something I cannot understand right now. She rises moving her lips to mine and kissing me, hand cupping my face.

This should terrify me but instead I let out a delighted sigh, leaning into her touch and opening my mouth willingly when her tongue ghosts over my lips. She pulls pack watching me with that same expression. “Clove.” She whispers tenderly.

I open my eyes, heart hammering in my chest. The weight hasn’t left although the feeling of safety and contentment are fading away. Especially when I realise just what or who the weight on my chest is.

Katniss twitches, her fingers curling into my shirt, she shivers drawing herself closer to me. She seems to be asleep. I frown, nervousness settling in my stomach. Why is she here? What is she doing? I wonder when she will wake up. When she will try to hurt me, she’s a mutt. Mutts are created by the Capitol to kill, to hurt.

I pull at the restraints keeping my arms and legs from moving, feeling helpless. If she were to wake up I’d be at her mercy. My breathing quickens, my body trembles. I close my eyes, behind them I see the same vision. Is it a memory or a dream? I wonder, I keep my eyes closed, preferring the feelings of warmth and safety over the feelings of confusion and fear.

Is the Katniss in my mind right now the same Katniss currently lying on my chest? The doctors, they said the Capitol had done something to my memories, hijacked them. That Katniss doesn’t want to hurt me. I don’t know if I can trust them, I don’t know if I can trust Katniss when she says she won’t hurt me.

She’s a mutt, is she? She wants to hurt me, does she really? I love her, do I? I’m so confused my brain hurts, I wish she’d wake up and move and yet. I open my eyes trying my best to still my shaking, I don’t want to disturb her. I’ve seen the bags under her eyes, she looks exhausted. Why would I care? I don’t know, but I do.

I pull at the restraints on my arms, half wanting to encircle my arms around her like in my memory. Her hair hangs loosely. I’ve not seen her put it in a braid since I’ve been here, I wonder if that means something. Perhaps that means she is not the same person from my memory. Perhaps she just doesn’t want to be bothered with tying her hair into a braid right now.

The scent of her hair is familiar, soft and warm, sweet, it smells like, home. I don’t know where home is. District 2 that’s what the doctors said.

“My name is Clove Sevina, I was born in District 2, I am 16 years old. I was in the Hunger Games.” I whisper, I frown trying to remember the rest, that’s where is gets fuzzy. That’s where the fear starts, that’s where the desire to run into Katniss’ arms and hide my face in her shoulder as she holds me begins. Why would I want that? Katniss is dangerous, she’s a mutt, is she?

She’s stirring now, I suck in a gasp, I hadn’t meant to wake her. I’m not sure if I’m afraid or guilty when she opens her eyes, raising her head to look at me.

“Clove.” She pulls away quickly, I almost miss the warmth and pressure, almost. I follow her with my eyes not trusting myself to speak. She watches me moving to sit on the edge of the bed her face cautious. “I’m sorry.” Her words confuse me, I narrow my eyes wondering just what she’s playing at but the words seem sincere, what she’s sorry for I don’t know.

She gulps looking away from my scrutinising gaze, swallowing hard. She releases a long breath her moving her hands towards me but then seems to think better of it flexing her finger before clasping her knees.

“Why?” I ask, my voice hoarse, her eyes snap to mine wide. I think it’s the first thing I’ve said to her since I’ve been here, apart from the things I shouted, calling her a mutt and a monster and all sorts of other things. She watches me with wide eyes frowning slightly in confusion. I swallow licking my lips awkwardly. “Why are you sorry?” I clarify, her eyes widen.

She indicates to my chest. “I shouldn’t have… I… I just wanted to rest my head there a while I’m sorry, I should’ve asked you if that was ok first.” She looks down her lip pulled between her teeth, her eyes wet with unshed tears.

“It’s ok...” I watch her, she glances at me turning away probably trying to hide her tears.

“I didn’t mean to scare you.” She sighs, examining her knees.

“You didn’t.” I tell her, because it’s true, I wasn’t scared exactly, confused, nervous perhaps but not scared. The terror I’d felt previously is absent for now. She seems unconvinced, I let out a slow breath wondering if I should mention what I saw, what I remembered? Dreamed? Perhaps she could tell me if it was a memory. I close my eyes, the fuzzy pool of memories supplying snippets of the same actions, her head on my chest, my hands in her hair, my arms around her. “You...Never asked before.”

I open my eyes to find Katniss staring at me, eyes wide and… Hope brimming behind her tears. I wish my hands were free so I could wipe her tears away, the sight makes me uncomfortable. In what way exactly I don’t know. “I...” She hesitantly shifts closer to me watching my body language carefully. I tense I can’t help it, is this where she decides to kill me? To hit me? I hold my breath, she gazes at me backing away slightly.

“I used to rest my head there a lot, you never seemed to mind.” She confirms, I wish she’d look away, her grey eyes are making me uncomfortable with the amount of intensity in them.

“I used to… Wrap my arms around you?” I move my arms, frowning when they reach the end of their restraints. Why do I keep forgetting about the strips binding me? Katniss smiles, the sight of her like that sends a jolt through me. Is that a good jolt or a bad jolt? I shift uncomfortably looking anywhere but Katniss’ face. “You wore your hair in a braid, I used to undo it...I used to run my fingers through your hair… You seemed to like that.” The words are spilling from my lips, I find Katniss’ gaze once more. She’s nodding her eyes glowing.

“Yeah, I’d come home from hunting with Gale, you’d pull me back into bed and we’d lie like that for a while.” I frown, hunting? Gale? I can barely remember who this Gale is. A girl...No Gale is a boy. A tall boy, looks like Katniss. Katniss hunting is easier to see in my minds eye, hair tied into a braid, a bow in her hand. A bow pointing towards me an arrow pointing towards me. I squirm, panic increasing. She’s a mutt! She’s a murderer! She’s going to get her bow and she’s going to put an arrow in my chest.

“Clove are you ok?” Her hand brushes my arm. The scream rips through my throat, I thrash against my restraints trying to rip my hands free, trying to get my hands around her neck. Katniss is a murderer, she hunts down people with her bow. Her bow brings death to people. To me. To Marvel. Marvel was a friend, Marvel was an ally, she killed him in cold blood. I need to kill her, I won’t be safe from her until she’s dead.

“Mutt! Murderer! Monster, I’ll kill you, I’ll kill you.” I screech, my eyes are surely wild as I bare my teeth, if only I could move my arms, get my legs free or something. Katniss moves closer to me, she’s making shushing noises, no she can’t be near me not like this. Not unless I’m above her, unless her neck is in my grip.

“Clove calm down it’s ok.” I spit in her face, snapping my jaws in an attempt to bite the fingers that clasp around my face. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

“You’re a mutt, a Capitol mutt!” I scream, my breath coming out in short gasps. Suddenly Katniss is gone, instead replaced with an unfamiliar woman in a white outfit. She holds a syringe. No! No not again. I thrash against my restraints. “Please no, Please don’t.” I beg I can’t have any more of that venom in me. I can’t have any more terror pulsing through my veins.

Hand push me down stopping me from moving. I scream, Cato looms over me a sword in his hand. President Snow stands to the side, syringe of tracker jacker venom pressed to my neck. I can hear the buzzing of others, of tracker jackers. I’m going to be stung. Katniss? Where is Katniss?

“Katniss! Katniss! Help!” I scream, Katniss wants to kill me, Katniss will keep me safe, Katniss hates me, Katniss loves me, Katniss is a mutt, Katniss is the girl I love. I don’t know what’s true anymore. The needle plunges into my skin the world spins.

“Let me through, let me through to her.” I can hear Katniss’ voice, suddenly the restraints are gone, I’m pulled into a strong embrace, I can no longer support my head it falls onto a shoulder. “Leave us be.” I take a deep breath, sweet, soft, warmth filling my senses. The drugs already taking affect, my brain is filled with fog. I don’t want to sleep, I know I will have to. Sleep only brings nightmares, things I don’t know are real or not. Memories or dreams? Reality or lies?

“Katniss.” I slur, the arms around me tighten. I’m half aware of other voices, angry voices, condescending voices, hands pulling at the warmth around me trying to pry me away from this temporary haven. I whimper, a noise that make my blood run cold with more fear. I’m weak I can’t be weak no, I’ll be punished for showing weakness, they’ll just give me more venom or worse. I struggle against the arms holding me trying to fight off my attackers.

Warm breath tickles my ear. “Your name is Clove Sevina, you’re 16 years old, you were born in District 2, you were in the Hunger Games, you won the games with Katniss Everdeen, you moved to District 12, there is no District 12 anymore…” Katniss pauses, taking a moment to compose herself, I reach up wrapping my arms around her neck slowly waiting for her to continue. I can barely keep my eyes open so I don’t try, I’m vaguely aware of shuffling around me and agitated whispers but I can’t process them, nothing else matters expect for Katniss’ voice, the a warmth around me and the familiar soft scent that has captured my attention. “You’re in District 13, you were captured but now you’ve been rescued. You’re safe...”

She’s still talking but I can no longer distinguish her words, it sounds as if she’s talking through water. I’m barely aware of my head falling onto something soft, of something warm being pulled over my shoulders. I almost pull myself out of the foggy blackness that’s pulling me down at the lack of warm arms around me but soon a warm body is pressed against my back, an arm slipping around my waist. Lips press into the back of my neck.

“Stay with me.” The words escape my lips without much thought. I don’t want to sleep on my own, that’s when the nightmares strike. That’s when I forget who I am, when reality get confused with fantasy.

“Forever.” Katniss’ voice whispers. Something stirs in my memory but I’m too tired to go delving into the fog. My only response is to curl halfway into a ball, hands clutching the arm draped around me as I let the blackness claim me.

  


**Katniss POV:**

“You should go.”

“No.” I say simply, not even sparing the idiot nurse a glance, doesn’t she understand? Clove needs me, I’m helping her. Of course she doesn’t, these District 13 medics think they know it all when they don’t understand.

She doesn’t understand that sleep is the worst time for a victor, that’s when darkness creeps into your mind unbidden. When you wake up in terror. Clove needs me here, especially since when she awakes she cannot tell what is real.

“Miss Everdeen I am not leaving you alone with Miss Sevina unrestrained. Have you forgotten she tried to kill you?” A hand lands on my shoulder, I shrug it off, hardening my gaze. Of course I remember, I remember her hands closing around my neck, I remember gasping for breath. But I also remember the terror in her eyes. She was afraid of me. I gulp closing my eyes momentarily.

I’d not had much conversation with Clove. I’ve visited her as often as the doctors will allow. More so even, sneaking in here when no one is looking. They’ve decided it’s best to keep her restrained but I can see how this only makes her more afraid, how is she supposed to trust them if they tie her down like they did in the Capitol?

Usually she sleeps when I visit, under the influence of I don’t know how many drugs, they like to keep her sedated. Like that will help her. She needs to see she’s safe, needs to see where she is. She has nightmares despite the drugs. I know this because I’ve calmed her down from them, she doesn’t usually wake, only relaxing after a while leaning into my touch with a sigh falling deeper into what I can only hope is a comforting sleep.

When she’s awake she’s only ever hurled insults at me, curses trying to fight against her restraints to get to me, or to get away from me. But today when she watched me eyes full of mistrust but she spoke to me, it’s an improvement. For a moment there I saw her, how she used to be. My Clove. I know she’s still there, just broken. No not broken, shattered. It’s going to take a lot of time and effort to piece her back together but she’s worth it. She’s worth every second, every bruise, every insult.

“Miss Everdeen your girlfriend is not in her right mind when the drugs wear off she will awake and if she’s unrestrained and you’re here well...” I turn, loosening my grip on Clove only slightly.

“She remembered something.” Is all I say, the nurses eyes widen she takes a step back looking around the room at the men who helped her restrain Clove.

“I will speak to my superiors but you really need to leave.” I shake my head, this woman clearly thinks Clove is a lost cause.

“Didn’t you see how I was the one who calmed her down, all you did was scare her more.” I growl, I know this is the wrong thing to say when the nurse glares at me.

“The drugs calmed her down.” She drawls folding her arms across her chest. I roll my eyes.

“Sure put her to sleep, would’ve been a sleep filled with nightmares though, I’ve seen her after you’ve put her out, she may be asleep but she’s terrified. I can keep her calm.” The nurse sighs, shaking her head.

“Very well, she should sleep for a few hours I’ll return in half an hour to put the restraints back on her.” With that the nurse leaves. Leaving me alone with Clove, my Clove.

  


  


 

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this a while ago, it was originally going to be part of a larger story but I reckon I'm probably not going to get around to writing it so figured I'd just post it.


End file.
